Thursday, March 02, 2006

my son, do not walk in fear...

I have had this post in my heart for weeks now, and I can't sleep anymore until it is written. I am so sick of the injustice and ignorance that is all around us. And I am sick of hearing myself say that I am sick of it. Tonight, instead, I have written a letter to my Jack; a prayer for him that his generation will be better...and in writing these words, maybe I can find the strength to be better too.

My Son,

Do not walk in fear. For this not the spirit that He has given you. You are filled with a spirit of power, and of love and of a sound mind. Within your soul is the power of the one who created the heavens and the earth, the love of the Savior who died for every man, and the sound mind to reject the ignorance of this world. Don't be fooled by those who proclaim to follow Him, yet ignore His suffering children. And don't let that ignorance creep into your spirit. Seek Him with all of your heart and your heart will begin to break for those things that His heart breaks for. Your eyes will no longer see black, white, male, female, gentile, jew, gay, straight, punk, gangster, rich, poor. But your eyes will see people; people made in the image of God, people whom God dearly loves and wants you to love as well. Love them, my son. Love them unswervingly, unconventionally, unconditionally. Love them when they don't want to be loved, and when everyone else gives up on them. Walk alongside your fellow man with the knowledge that you share one maker, one hope and one destiny; with the knowledge that our God is making all things new...that there is going to be a great big party in the sky and that we are all invited.

This walk will not be easy, but do not be discouraged, for He is with you always. Some say that the children are the future. And, in that future, you may very well hear generations past crying out for you to save them from what they have done to one another. We are guilty of hate, guilty of injustice, guilty of violence, guilty of self-indulgence, guilty of ignorance. And yet, in the midst of all of this guilt is a perfect sea that bathes it all in mercy. Do not carry our guilt. For the Lord does not delight in sacrifice. The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart. So let your heart be broken, my precious son. As it is broken, let it be filled with the redemptive love of our Savior, and then live in response to that redemption you have received. My son, do not carry the weight of the world on your shoulders. This world is not yours to judge, or even to fix. Find rest in Him, for his yoke is easy and his burden is light. The very one who created you, who spoke the earth into existence, longs to give you rest for your soul. He who sees the depths of that soul, and all of the darkness that creeps in, sees only light. So do not be afraid, or worry about tomorrow. Live today in the grace and mercy of Christ, and with the knowledge that only in death will you truly gain. For today my son, act justly, love mercy, and walk humbly with your God. Walk with the God who says that yes, life is hard, and yes we will fail, but that he is Lord and there is no mistake that you can make that will keep him from being glorified when you make that your priority. Love and live, not as one checking off a list...or measuring faith by what you are against; what you can't or won't do. And keep your eyes open so you don't miss those sacred moments of Heaven breaking through.

Love your family, love your friends, love your enemies, love those you cannot see who are on the other side of the world. Know that to live is Christ. And Christ did not live safely. My son, I pray that you will live so boldly that you will drive fear into the heart of the evil that lurks outside your door. I pray that your eyes will see the hurting, the forgotten; those who think that they have no one. Bear their burdens, and instead of trying to have wise words about the plans of God, leave those plans to him. He will be the ultimate haven of rest...but in this life, my son, be a shoulder that is okay to cry on, an ear that doesn't mind the screaming, and a heart that shares the pain of your brothers and sisters. For the same Lord who gave us his unfailing love watched His son die on a tree for your fallen soul. And I know He must have hurt deeply for His child. Learn from this my child. It is okay to hurt, it is okay to be angry. Know that you have a God who is big enough for both your praise and your fear. It is important to remember Friday as we anxiously await Sunday. But Sunday will come. Sunday will come, and then we shall know fully; even as we are fully known. The injustice and sin and pain will all fall away, leaving only that which he created us to be. Sunday will come...all things will be made new...and LOVE WILL WIN.

I love you more than I could ever explain...and my precious son, I pray that you will always know how much you are loved. I pray that even more than the love of a parent, you will know the indescribable love of God that will never fail you. You are mine for awhile, but you are His for all time. I pray that your life will be a reflection of his grace and peace. And I pray that you will love with His heart. Let your loyalty not lie in the busyness of religion, but in the business of his kingdom. For He has called you to be his disciple and He has called you to a love that will lay its life down for another. Lay your life down, my son. Take His love into the dark corners, for He is already there waiting for you. Let His perfect love drive out all fear. Let your generation be the one to see justice rolling down like rivers and righteousness like an ever-flowing stream.

My son, do not walk in fear, for this is not the spirit He has given you. His words are written on your heart, and your name is engraved on the palm of his hand. He will not forget you. Do not forget Him or His children. Walk with a sound mind, in love and in power. Walk forward towards the cross, run to the hurting, rest in his grace, and meet me at the party.

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19 comments:

jettybetty said...

Tine--WOW!!!!
This is powerful--I wish I had been as wise when my children were young! I believe Jack is already learning about some of the things you write about--because he has a mom and dad that not only can verbalize such important, undeniable truths, but live them each day.
Please don't give up as a parent--you know some days it's so hard--but teaching our children what you write about here--is really what it's all about.
Is is okay if I reference this in my post for today?

Jenna said...

Wow Tine... What wonderful words. I'm so glad you shared!

Love you...

Lynn said...

Tine.....I have chill bumps. What a powerful post. I think one of the spiritual downfalls of living in a small town with one c of c, as far as I can see is this....We are sheltered from all that c of c differences, backstabbing, "holier c of c church than thou c of c church" stuff. Instead we are like denomination against denomination. I know that is no better. I may not have learned many lessons in my life but I did learn to not judge others. I pray to be more and more like you describe a Christian should be. Does that make sense? I have always known that Jack and other babies to come will fall from heaven to you and Matt with an unconditional love for all mankind. Don't worry. God has given you a true purpose and you are aware of it. The problem with most, me included, is that they don't know their purpose. You are an example to all of your family. I am proud of you and love you bunches....love you all. Aunt Lynn

mindy tyndall said...

Well, I have waited all day to post. I did, however, link several people to your mommy mumblings!
Your dad asked me, first thing, "did you read Christine's post today?". I had not. Then I got to deal with a very nice plumber who told me just a little later that we have a "slab leak"...thus, explaining the small pond in my flower beds. The air conditioning guy will be here tomorrow...who knew it would be 93 on March 1? After I got to work and went through a pile of things to do, your poppa called. He asked me if I'd read your post. I hadn't, but I thought I'd better, since people were calling me. Poppa told me that he had taught a class on Sunday where he had begun with the first 3 lines of your post. I got my coffee, glanced once again at my photo of my adorable Jack, and clicked on.
After the amazing service we'd had last night, I just didn't think there could be anything more that would move me so much. And I began to read.
Jack Franklin Pinson is a very blessed, precious soul. I am so blessed to be your mama. Everyone who happens to come across this post will be blessed because you are bold enough to record your thoughts and insights and hopes for your baby boy. I am so proud of you and Matt and the paths you are choosing - to raise Jack to rely on the Lord from the very beginning, to see beyond the appearance of people and look into their hearts, and to always, always look forward to heaven.
Every day I begin by lifting you, Matt and Jack, Emily and Brad up to the Lord. I have been given so much in return. I love you bunches! Hugs...Mama

jodyreese said...

Thanks for sharing with us, Tine. I was missing you and I don't understand that other place you sent us to..."MySpace"? I like your blog better! You are an amazing writer...gifted truly...and God has touched your heart in such a special way. We love you! Jody

mattr_pinson said...

My heart is overflowing with a sense of pride and love. I thank God everyday for you.

Katey said...

That is powerful and beautiful and challenging all at the same time. While I don't have children I want to thank you for challenging me to live my life everyday like you encourage Jack too. I pray that one day I will be a mother like you. Your heart and your wisdom is something I will always aspire to have. Love you!

Kate said...

Jack will love having this and other letters you and Matt have written to him to look back on someday. For now, your powerful words are so inspiring to all of us who come across them. Thank you for sharing your heart so passionately and for having such a passionate heart!
Love you!

Melanie Morales said...

What an inspiration you've been to me with this post today! It reminded me of my book of prayers I'm writing for Kade along the way - and that I haven't done that in awhile. I've prayed - just haven't written them down.

Anonymous said...

Tine-
Jack is so lucky to have such God-seeking parents!! He will cherish these letters. You have been given a gift of expression in words, music, and action. I am so thankful to have an example like you.
Beth

Shelly said...

You could seriously publish some of the stuff you write in some sort of book. This letter is so amazing. What a gift to your sweet son! And yes, Hayley IS promoting with him this Sunday! After I picked her up Sunday night I was kind of sad as I realized it was the last time she'd be in the nursery! They are growing so fast. I'm so glad that Hayley and "Gack" still get to be together. I'm actually the helper in their class. John and Courtney are their teachers. I'm sure we'll have some good stories to tell about these crazy kiddos. See you tomorrow!

J-Wild said...

Fantastic. Look for yourself on the blog roll come Easter. Thanks for your post on my blog I really appreciate the kind words. You know NYC is a great place for a son to learn all the things you wrote about.

Emily said...

i am more amazed every day at the mother you are and continue to become. you not only impact our sweet jack by your sprirt-but you impact all of us that come in contact with you. I too pray this prayer for jack, and i am so grateful and in awe that the Lord saw fit to bless me with a sister, brother-in-law, and precious nephew that encourage me daily in the Lord. We all needed to be reminded of this prayer...
i love you,
em

Kate said...

That was beautiful and so articulate. I'm going to print this out as a reminder for myself as a mother. Thank you.

Giggi said...

You're an amazing girl. I'm so proud to be your other mother. you are such a gifted writer. You really do need to write a book, and I'm not even kidding. (I hear that I'm not even kidding line alot around here). I'm so proud of you and Matt. Jack is a very blessed little guy, and I'm a very blessed giggy.

Finally an Abrigg..... said...

May 18-21st! :) Is that when you guys are going??!?!

Emily said...

this may seem insensitive..however you know i love this post, but are you just going to leave it up till jack can read it? i mean i am sure he will be reading in a few months, but i am also sure you could write some more amazing posts in the mean time and just print this one out...
love your bossy (and favorite)sister,
em

Laura said...

I want to thank you for the birthday message you left on my husband's blog. After taking a look at your blog and your interests, I think we would be friends if you just happened to live in Brooklyn:) This letter to your son is absolutely beautiful. Thank you for sharing your thoughts with him and us. Laura Hays

Allison said...

I found this post after reading a note you left on my blog. Thanks for reading my annual :) post, and for leading me to this. Kate E. is one of my closest friends and has it right in saying that she will print this out for herself--I will keep it as well if you don't mind! Thank you for putting the heart and energy into such a moving, passionate letter that resonates with the themes we all feel but don't always take the time to write down. We would love to meet you when you come to New York--please contact us! ai