thank you so much for the many prayers that have been sent up over this past week and months...and thank you for continuing to pray as we are on this new part of the journey with sweet baby sam...
he is still a little fighter...his nurses even say so! his weight today was
3 lb, 8 oz...just a little peanut, but a strong one...he is still in his isolette getting phototherapy for his jaundice, but this is very normal, and hopefully he will be out of there very soon where we can touch him and hold him...he can't have his clothes on in there so they have to keep him closed up so he won't get too cold...they did wrap him up in about 5 blankets and let me hold him for awhile today, so that was the best thing ever...of course, i could hardly feel his tiny little body under all that blanket...
his biggest issue right now is learning to eat and tolerating what they feed him through his NG tube...he is getting better and they are giving him the milk that i am pumping so i can feel like i am contributing somewhat to that...
his withdrawal symptoms are still there, but still minimal, so that is a huge praise...he's still having some irritability, vomiting and tremors, but overall is just doing amazingly well...which we know is because of all of your prayers and because of the power of our GOD.
i am walking around in a fog right now- after these many months of what we have been through, i have to keep reminding myself that i just gave birth four days ago...i am trying to journal down some of my thoughts as i go through this part of the journey and maybe someday i will be able to share them, because i know that when we look back on this season we will see nothing but blessings from the LORD's hand...it was very very hard to leave the hospital last night and tonight and not have my baby in my arms...but i am confident that the LORD is holding him when i cannot. and i am thankful to have my other two men at home to love on...i am very blessed...
we have taken lots of pictures and will post them as soon as we can...i'll try to update as much as i can without having the internet at our new house yet...we can't wait for the day that our little family of four is all at home and we can introduce sam to the many people that have been praying for him for so long before he was even born.
Friday, June 22, 2007
Tuesday, June 19, 2007
Sweet Baby Sam
I know that it has been awhile...okay, a LONG time since I last blogged. And yes, alot has happened in that time. This pregnancy has been one of the hardest times of our life, as most of you who read this blog know. I promise that I really have sat down MANY times with the intention of blogging, and the words just won't come. I am still not sure that I have words adequate to express what is on my heart, but when I do finally write it is always somehow therapeutic for me.
The last time I posted we were overjoyed having just found out that baby #2 would be coming this summer.
We are still overjoyed...and now it is because HE IS HERE. Samuel Ray Pinson was born yesterday.
The little man that so many have brought to the feet of the Father has made his entrance into the world. The only sustainance our little family has had over the last many weary months has been the faithful hand of our Father and the prayers and support of so many family members and friends. I will sit down soon and attempt to write more about these experiences we have endured, and the faithfulness of our Lord that we have witnessed over and over...but at this very moment I know all you want to do is hear about our little guy and, of course, see some pictures! I believe these stats and pictures are some of the greatest testimonies of God's faithfulness anyway...
We checked in yesterday morning at 7AM, prepared for a long day. After months of hospitalizations, home health care, hyperemesis, pain, infection, and premature labor...our doctor had made the decision, along with the neonatologists, to induce labor at exactly 33 weeks. We weren't exactly sure how my body would want to progress, as they had given me shots so many times to attempt to stop labor, and now they were trying to start it. But once again, the Lord was faithful. The day started off pretty slow, and we expected it to be the middle of the night before our little guy decided to make himself known...but he wanted a grand entrance...in the span of about an hour, I went from being dilated to a 4 to the nurses trying to hold him off from coming out before the doctor made it to the hospital in Arlington from their second office in Mansfield. That was one of the longest and most stressful hours of our lives, and yet it also felt like a whirlwind. Sam's heart rate began to drop very low, into the 80s and 90s. The room began to get more and more crowded with nurses, all doing different things to try and keep him stimulated and get his heart rate back up so that we could try to avoid a C Section. They were flipping me over into every different position, giving me oxygen, massaging my stomach, massaging his head...his little tiny head was so small, he figured that he could just make it out at a 6 rather than waiting till I was dilated all the way to a 10! I finally ended up flat on my back with the bed tilted backwards and head down. Labor and delivery nurses are truly amazing. Thankfully, the doctor made it, and within about 10 minutes of him getting in the room, baby Sam was here. I only got a very quick glimpse of him, while they layed him on my stomach for about 3 seconds and Matt cut the umbilical cord. He only needed a little bit of oxygen right at first, and then they whisked him away to the NICU. We wanted to go with him of course, but were mostly just so thankful that he was here. Matt did get to go down and see him pretty quickly and was able to get some pictures to bring back down to the room for me. I was anxious to see my little boy, and as soon as they could get me into a wheelchair, I got to go to the NICU, and was especially excited to get to touch him! He was perfect, he was beautiful...so tiny, and yet so strong. We spent a little bit of time with him, and then went back to see him again last night before going back to get a little bit of rest. He was still having some trouble breathing, doing alot of grunting and just having to work very hard, but so far, he is still on room air. His biggest trouble right now is eating, but of course this is very normal for his age. He still has to work on that suck-swallow-breathe coordination. It will just take him awhile to learn how to do all that at once, and his little tummy is just very tiny, so they have cut back trying to feed him, only giving him about a teaspoon through a tube in his nose. But also amazingly he has not had to get an IV yet. He is definitely a little fighter...the neonatologists had warned us that little white males for some reason tend to have the most trouble getting going...but we knew better. I still need to post the last sonogram we had taken before he was born, where behind his head it looks like he is being held by a very large hand...which he, of course, was. And we know just whose Hand is carrying him through right now.
The doctor said that he is looking good. They will be looking next for symptoms of withdrawal from the strong medicine that the doctors have had me on throughout the last several months. Unfortunately, if he does have problems from that it will be a long slow process to correct. We are confident that he will be just fine and that he will have no effect at all, and of course ask you to pray with us that even if he does, that it will be treated easily and he will suffer no long term effects. The doctor told us this morning, these signs do not really show up until day 3 or 4, so they will be looking for that in the mean time. The first 72 hours are most critical, so they just want to keep him stable for now. They will also wait until the beginning of next week to do a scan of his brain and check in out how things are going in there. So over the next few days, his biggest jobs are breathing, working on digesting his food and maintaining his temperature. Please pray that all of this will continue to go just as smoothly as it has so far. The nurses and doctors continue to comment on how amazing it is that he is doing this well for being so early and so tiny and, while it is amazing, we are not at all surprised. Please continue to join us in prayer that the LORD will sustain Samuel, Matt, Jack and me. Please pray for the doctors and nurses who are taking care of him and for our families who have altered their own lives to bless ours.
When we went to see him this morning, I did get to hold him and it was the most wonderful thing in the world. I continue to be very exhausted, overwhelmed and in pain, but we know that God will continue to sustain my health and pray for continued recovery and strength. I am just so blessed to have the most wonderful husband in the world, and now, my TWO precious little boys to remind me of why this fight is so worth it.
We continue to be so amazed and grateful for the support we have received and continue to receive from so many, and will have many many hugs to give, tears of joy to shed and thank you's to say. For now, I will stop rambling and give you what you really want...pictures of this little guy who has stolen all of our hearts!
We continue to claim this verse spoken in God's word by Hannah...what joy it brings us to say it now as we look at our precious little one
"I prayed for this child, and the LORD has granted me what I asked of him. So now I give him to the LORD. For his whole life he will be given over to the LORD."
~ I Samuel 1:27-28a
Samuel Ray Pinson
Monday, June 18th at 3:51 pm
3 lbs 13.6 oz
16 inches long
I'm sure we will have many more to come... I figured that this would be a good amount to get started!
We will try to update more often than every 6 months now...sorry that this one got really long and wordy...it's been a long few days...a long year really!
Again, thank you so much for your love and prayers...and please keep them coming, because we will continue to need them to get through this next part of the journey. We are overwhelmed and exhausted, and still feeling very helpless, but so very glad to be to this point in the journey where we can actually see the little one we have prayed over for so long. Words are not near enough to say how thankful we are to have such wonderful family, friends and to be a part of a wonderful and supportive community of faith. God's love and power is amazing. We are so very blessed.
The last time I posted we were overjoyed having just found out that baby #2 would be coming this summer.
We are still overjoyed...and now it is because HE IS HERE. Samuel Ray Pinson was born yesterday.
The little man that so many have brought to the feet of the Father has made his entrance into the world. The only sustainance our little family has had over the last many weary months has been the faithful hand of our Father and the prayers and support of so many family members and friends. I will sit down soon and attempt to write more about these experiences we have endured, and the faithfulness of our Lord that we have witnessed over and over...but at this very moment I know all you want to do is hear about our little guy and, of course, see some pictures! I believe these stats and pictures are some of the greatest testimonies of God's faithfulness anyway...
We checked in yesterday morning at 7AM, prepared for a long day. After months of hospitalizations, home health care, hyperemesis, pain, infection, and premature labor...our doctor had made the decision, along with the neonatologists, to induce labor at exactly 33 weeks. We weren't exactly sure how my body would want to progress, as they had given me shots so many times to attempt to stop labor, and now they were trying to start it. But once again, the Lord was faithful. The day started off pretty slow, and we expected it to be the middle of the night before our little guy decided to make himself known...but he wanted a grand entrance...in the span of about an hour, I went from being dilated to a 4 to the nurses trying to hold him off from coming out before the doctor made it to the hospital in Arlington from their second office in Mansfield. That was one of the longest and most stressful hours of our lives, and yet it also felt like a whirlwind. Sam's heart rate began to drop very low, into the 80s and 90s. The room began to get more and more crowded with nurses, all doing different things to try and keep him stimulated and get his heart rate back up so that we could try to avoid a C Section. They were flipping me over into every different position, giving me oxygen, massaging my stomach, massaging his head...his little tiny head was so small, he figured that he could just make it out at a 6 rather than waiting till I was dilated all the way to a 10! I finally ended up flat on my back with the bed tilted backwards and head down. Labor and delivery nurses are truly amazing. Thankfully, the doctor made it, and within about 10 minutes of him getting in the room, baby Sam was here. I only got a very quick glimpse of him, while they layed him on my stomach for about 3 seconds and Matt cut the umbilical cord. He only needed a little bit of oxygen right at first, and then they whisked him away to the NICU. We wanted to go with him of course, but were mostly just so thankful that he was here. Matt did get to go down and see him pretty quickly and was able to get some pictures to bring back down to the room for me. I was anxious to see my little boy, and as soon as they could get me into a wheelchair, I got to go to the NICU, and was especially excited to get to touch him! He was perfect, he was beautiful...so tiny, and yet so strong. We spent a little bit of time with him, and then went back to see him again last night before going back to get a little bit of rest. He was still having some trouble breathing, doing alot of grunting and just having to work very hard, but so far, he is still on room air. His biggest trouble right now is eating, but of course this is very normal for his age. He still has to work on that suck-swallow-breathe coordination. It will just take him awhile to learn how to do all that at once, and his little tummy is just very tiny, so they have cut back trying to feed him, only giving him about a teaspoon through a tube in his nose. But also amazingly he has not had to get an IV yet. He is definitely a little fighter...the neonatologists had warned us that little white males for some reason tend to have the most trouble getting going...but we knew better. I still need to post the last sonogram we had taken before he was born, where behind his head it looks like he is being held by a very large hand...which he, of course, was. And we know just whose Hand is carrying him through right now.
The doctor said that he is looking good. They will be looking next for symptoms of withdrawal from the strong medicine that the doctors have had me on throughout the last several months. Unfortunately, if he does have problems from that it will be a long slow process to correct. We are confident that he will be just fine and that he will have no effect at all, and of course ask you to pray with us that even if he does, that it will be treated easily and he will suffer no long term effects. The doctor told us this morning, these signs do not really show up until day 3 or 4, so they will be looking for that in the mean time. The first 72 hours are most critical, so they just want to keep him stable for now. They will also wait until the beginning of next week to do a scan of his brain and check in out how things are going in there. So over the next few days, his biggest jobs are breathing, working on digesting his food and maintaining his temperature. Please pray that all of this will continue to go just as smoothly as it has so far. The nurses and doctors continue to comment on how amazing it is that he is doing this well for being so early and so tiny and, while it is amazing, we are not at all surprised. Please continue to join us in prayer that the LORD will sustain Samuel, Matt, Jack and me. Please pray for the doctors and nurses who are taking care of him and for our families who have altered their own lives to bless ours.
When we went to see him this morning, I did get to hold him and it was the most wonderful thing in the world. I continue to be very exhausted, overwhelmed and in pain, but we know that God will continue to sustain my health and pray for continued recovery and strength. I am just so blessed to have the most wonderful husband in the world, and now, my TWO precious little boys to remind me of why this fight is so worth it.
We continue to be so amazed and grateful for the support we have received and continue to receive from so many, and will have many many hugs to give, tears of joy to shed and thank you's to say. For now, I will stop rambling and give you what you really want...pictures of this little guy who has stolen all of our hearts!
We continue to claim this verse spoken in God's word by Hannah...what joy it brings us to say it now as we look at our precious little one
"I prayed for this child, and the LORD has granted me what I asked of him. So now I give him to the LORD. For his whole life he will be given over to the LORD."
~ I Samuel 1:27-28a
Samuel Ray Pinson
Monday, June 18th at 3:51 pm
3 lbs 13.6 oz
16 inches long
What a precious moment of joy.
The proud big brother...what a blessed woman I am to have three men to love now!
Jack really liked the soccer ball that Baby Sam got for him!
First glimpses of our sweetie in the NICU.
Mommy's hand is really not very big, but it sure looks huge here!
So tiny next to Daddy's strong hands. And look at that head full of DARK hair...he definitely looks like a Pinson...he looks alot like Jack did, and ALOT like Matt as a baby.
Working on eating through his NG tube.
First chance to hold my angel. Nothing beats that.
Winking at mommy...he doesn't have to work too hard to charm me.
Enjoying some kangaroo time.
You can see how tiny he is here up next to Mommy. We remember Jack looking so tiny, and he had a good two pounds and 3 1/2 inches on Sam! It's amazing what a difference two pounds makes at this age!
I can't wait to spend lots of time like this.
Look how huge that "micro" paci looks in his mouth! I forgot how tiny those preemie diapers are, and he is wearing them folded in half right now!
I'm sure we will have many more to come... I figured that this would be a good amount to get started!
We will try to update more often than every 6 months now...sorry that this one got really long and wordy...it's been a long few days...a long year really!
Again, thank you so much for your love and prayers...and please keep them coming, because we will continue to need them to get through this next part of the journey. We are overwhelmed and exhausted, and still feeling very helpless, but so very glad to be to this point in the journey where we can actually see the little one we have prayed over for so long. Words are not near enough to say how thankful we are to have such wonderful family, friends and to be a part of a wonderful and supportive community of faith. God's love and power is amazing. We are so very blessed.
Wednesday, December 13, 2006
Tuesday, November 14, 2006
cute cute video of jack on matt's blog...
Our good friends, TJ and Holly are in the Dominican Republic running an outreach center for street children. They are not only filled with the spirit and well-equipped for this ministry, they are also dear friends and we miss them terribly. TJ is one of the most talented songwriters that we know and we have been blessed with his music while friends in college, when he sang at our wedding, and now as Jack has become his #1 fan! Before they left for the Dominican, TJ recorded a children's album which I HIGHLY RECOMMEND...Jack loves it and Matt has posted a little video on his blog of him singing one of the songs that he loves most...hope you enjoy it!
Tuesday, October 24, 2006
in sickness and in health...
...oh, did Matthew Pinson really know what he was getting himself into when he said those words? This past month has been a rollercoaster of emotion, physical pain, crying out to the Lord asking why but, also, of being very thankful for life. Honestly, it hasn't been a month...it's been eight years...and really something that the doctors now say was probably there since birth.
Confused? Don't worry...we were too...although most of the people who read this blog already know most of this struggle, for they are the people who have raised me, the people who have been my friends and family and have walked alongside me in the valleys.
Warning: the following gets a little wordy and medical, but it helps explain...
Eight years ago, I went in to the hospital with abdominal pain. I was 18 years old. what followed was a six-month stay on a pediatric cancer and leukemia floor; consisting of an appendectomy, gall bladder removal, multiple other surgeries and procedures, and a diagnosis consisting of, but not limited to, pancreatitis, a hiatal hernia, superior mesenteric artery syndrome, and a possible motility disorder in my digestive system. I was not able to eat the entire time; being fed with feeding tubes and pretty much sedated on morphine the whole time because of the intense pain I was experiencing. Doctors were so puzzled; not understanding why an 18 year old would get pancreatitis, the chief concern and cause of pain, in the first place. They continued to perform exploratory surgeries looking for answers and really came up pretty blank. I left the hospital after six months; after celebrating every major holiday in that tiny room, weighing 85 pounds, with a little bit of temporary relief, but no real answers.
Fast forward a little bit (I promise I'll try not to make this ten pages long)...
Throughout the past eight years since that initial hospital stay, I have spent many nights in emergency rooms several times each year. I have graduated college, gotten married, and had my sweet baby Jack. Each time I have gone in with recurrences of pain, nausea, vomiting, etc. They do all of the routine bloodwork, ocassionally admit me for a few days and generally come back empty handed; usually telling me it's irritable bowel syndrome or gas pains, or of course my favorite-telling me nothing and instead sending in a psychiatrist to evaluate me while I am in some of the most intense pain of my life. All of the scar tissue from my past procedures have caused quite a bit of issue as well, such as severe pain from adhesions and the tissue not being able to stretch beyond a certain point, resulting in our baby being born five weeks early (praise God, he was totally healthy and has been my sunshine ever since). It has been frustrating to say the least, but I have since pretty much been resigned that I will just have to live with that pain forever and do what I need to in order to be what I need to be, such as a wife, a mother and a teacher...no problem, right?
Wrong...
Many people know that this past year I went back to work, teaching middle school theatre, as well as being in grad school to complete my Masters of Education. it's a job that I really do love. I get to use my theatre degree, I get to be around middle schoolers who, despite their interesting smells, are really some of my favorite people in the world. It has been hard...on many levels...most of all, because I am away from my Jack. Being home with him for two years non-stop was a true blessing that I will never take for granted. but he has done so well-he loves his sweet sitter and we have also had so much help from our families. Going back to work has also been hard on my body. On the 20th of last month (September, right?), after teaching school all day and then having required staff development after school, I called Matt to tell him that I was really not feeling well at all. what followed was a hospital stay of almost three weeks. Once again, all the tests and once again all my fears waiting to hear those words, "Well, we just can't seem to figure it out". The Lord blessed us with an amazing team of doctors; doctors who showed us determination and human kindness. at first they believed that I had celiac disease, which is an intolerance to gluten. They put me on a gluten-free diet, but it did not seem to help any, and although my biopsies looked like celiac, the blood test was negative. My gastroenterologist then started to suspect something very rare called Sphincter of Oddi Dysfunction (yeah, you can imagine why i have chosen not to share the name of this problem with my middle schoolers!) When he told me that I was that mystery patient that all the doctors were discussing at lunch, well honestly I was not flattered! But, I was very thankful to have proactive doctors for the first time in a long time.
I won't go into all of the medical details. if you are that interested, give me a call or google it. And actually Matt has become very good at explaining the workings of the digestive system, so you might just call him! But what basically happened is that the Lord's hand intervened so perfectly that the doctors caught the symptoms of this rare disease at just the right time, right when my body was in a flare up and my liver functions were off the charts. It's something that you really have to be looking for in order to catch it. I ended up getting transferred to a hospital in dallas and was blessed to get in with the leading doctor in the world for this condition who performed my surgery. Ironically, he works only on this disease in conjuction with the Mayo Clinic, which is where they wanted to send me eight years ago to have tests run for a newly discovered problem (the one I was just diagnosed with). When the doctor in Dallas measured the pressures in my bile ducts(I apologize if you are reading this over some sort of meal) they were at 80 and 110, when they are supposed to be around 40. That explains some pain, huh? Basically nothing was getting through, and I was apparently born with two of these ducts instead of one. So, he just made an incision and then placed a stent in my pancreas. Looking back, all of it fits together, and they really do think that this is going to ease a great deal of the pain that I have felt for so many years. We did have a little setback, ending up back in the hospital just two days after going home. I had ended up with a blood clot from my PICC line that they had finally put in because of my horrible tiny veins that have been ruined through the years of so many hospital stays. Then when they put me on blood thinners, after only two days my blood was so thin that they could not even measure it in the lab. The blood thinners are supposed to make your blood clot at 2 to 3 times the normal rate, and the highest the lab could measure was 23 times the normal rate...mine was past that! The doctors said if I had fallen, not even cut myself, but just run into something, I could have bled to death. That was definitely scary because we have dealt with the pain, nausea and vomiting for years now, but never blood clots or internal bleeding. Once again, the doctors took very good care of me and I only had to stay three additional days in the hospital.
I spent the next few weeks trying to return to "normal", and I am still not there. I did go back to school a week and a half ago, and that has definitely been a challenge, but good to get back into a routine. Although I must admit that I am already looking forward to the holiday breaks! I still feel quite weak, but my school is being so supportive and we have had an amazing amount of help from family and friends.
This post is a little too informational for my taste, but it's hard to know how to explain all that I have been feeling without explaining what we have been dealing with. Pain has been a part of my daily life for so long, and while the doctors say that this won't completely change that, I look forward to the prospect of it being much less. We have felt so surrounded in prayer and love from our community of faith, and I have been reminded once again of what an amazing family I have and what an amazing and powerful God that we serve.
It's funny and amazing to me because, honestly, I think that Matt did know what he was getting into. He knew that taking me as a life mate also meant taking all of my health problems. And he took me anyway. He has been my rock through all of this and I can't ever find words to say how thankful I am that God made him my husband. I don't know how he did all that he did, spending the nights in a chair by my bedside, taking care of Jack, going to work every day, not to mention running lesson plans back and forth to school and putting my grades in the computer for me! What a guy! My parents and Matt's parents were amazing in helping with Jack and also spent countless hours by my side. My mom and dad have been there every step of the way, since this first began many years ago...and there is no way I could have ever made it through without them.
I have written before about Matt being the student council president at Fort Worth Christian when my mom was working there and I was in the hospital eight years ago (the six month stay). He led many prayers for Mrs. Tyndall's daughter(that would be me) who was so sick in the hospital. Little did he know that he was praying for the girl that would one day be his wife. We know now that God was answering those prayers for years to come. He healed me then and those prayers that Matt prayed for my healing continue to be answered as he now stands beside me as my husband.
I am, above all, thankful for the Lord's healing in my life. Just as I have been saved by Him, and continue to be saved each new day, I have witnessed first hand as he daily heals not just my soul but also my body. He also knew what he was getting into, and yet He still sent His son to save me. In the past month, I can honestly say that I have felt that salvation on a physical as well as spiritual level in a whole new way. Praise God for new beginnings...His power really is made perfect in our weakness!
Confused? Don't worry...we were too...although most of the people who read this blog already know most of this struggle, for they are the people who have raised me, the people who have been my friends and family and have walked alongside me in the valleys.
Warning: the following gets a little wordy and medical, but it helps explain...
Eight years ago, I went in to the hospital with abdominal pain. I was 18 years old. what followed was a six-month stay on a pediatric cancer and leukemia floor; consisting of an appendectomy, gall bladder removal, multiple other surgeries and procedures, and a diagnosis consisting of, but not limited to, pancreatitis, a hiatal hernia, superior mesenteric artery syndrome, and a possible motility disorder in my digestive system. I was not able to eat the entire time; being fed with feeding tubes and pretty much sedated on morphine the whole time because of the intense pain I was experiencing. Doctors were so puzzled; not understanding why an 18 year old would get pancreatitis, the chief concern and cause of pain, in the first place. They continued to perform exploratory surgeries looking for answers and really came up pretty blank. I left the hospital after six months; after celebrating every major holiday in that tiny room, weighing 85 pounds, with a little bit of temporary relief, but no real answers.
Fast forward a little bit (I promise I'll try not to make this ten pages long)...
Throughout the past eight years since that initial hospital stay, I have spent many nights in emergency rooms several times each year. I have graduated college, gotten married, and had my sweet baby Jack. Each time I have gone in with recurrences of pain, nausea, vomiting, etc. They do all of the routine bloodwork, ocassionally admit me for a few days and generally come back empty handed; usually telling me it's irritable bowel syndrome or gas pains, or of course my favorite-telling me nothing and instead sending in a psychiatrist to evaluate me while I am in some of the most intense pain of my life. All of the scar tissue from my past procedures have caused quite a bit of issue as well, such as severe pain from adhesions and the tissue not being able to stretch beyond a certain point, resulting in our baby being born five weeks early (praise God, he was totally healthy and has been my sunshine ever since). It has been frustrating to say the least, but I have since pretty much been resigned that I will just have to live with that pain forever and do what I need to in order to be what I need to be, such as a wife, a mother and a teacher...no problem, right?
Wrong...
Many people know that this past year I went back to work, teaching middle school theatre, as well as being in grad school to complete my Masters of Education. it's a job that I really do love. I get to use my theatre degree, I get to be around middle schoolers who, despite their interesting smells, are really some of my favorite people in the world. It has been hard...on many levels...most of all, because I am away from my Jack. Being home with him for two years non-stop was a true blessing that I will never take for granted. but he has done so well-he loves his sweet sitter and we have also had so much help from our families. Going back to work has also been hard on my body. On the 20th of last month (September, right?), after teaching school all day and then having required staff development after school, I called Matt to tell him that I was really not feeling well at all. what followed was a hospital stay of almost three weeks. Once again, all the tests and once again all my fears waiting to hear those words, "Well, we just can't seem to figure it out". The Lord blessed us with an amazing team of doctors; doctors who showed us determination and human kindness. at first they believed that I had celiac disease, which is an intolerance to gluten. They put me on a gluten-free diet, but it did not seem to help any, and although my biopsies looked like celiac, the blood test was negative. My gastroenterologist then started to suspect something very rare called Sphincter of Oddi Dysfunction (yeah, you can imagine why i have chosen not to share the name of this problem with my middle schoolers!) When he told me that I was that mystery patient that all the doctors were discussing at lunch, well honestly I was not flattered! But, I was very thankful to have proactive doctors for the first time in a long time.
I won't go into all of the medical details. if you are that interested, give me a call or google it. And actually Matt has become very good at explaining the workings of the digestive system, so you might just call him! But what basically happened is that the Lord's hand intervened so perfectly that the doctors caught the symptoms of this rare disease at just the right time, right when my body was in a flare up and my liver functions were off the charts. It's something that you really have to be looking for in order to catch it. I ended up getting transferred to a hospital in dallas and was blessed to get in with the leading doctor in the world for this condition who performed my surgery. Ironically, he works only on this disease in conjuction with the Mayo Clinic, which is where they wanted to send me eight years ago to have tests run for a newly discovered problem (the one I was just diagnosed with). When the doctor in Dallas measured the pressures in my bile ducts(I apologize if you are reading this over some sort of meal) they were at 80 and 110, when they are supposed to be around 40. That explains some pain, huh? Basically nothing was getting through, and I was apparently born with two of these ducts instead of one. So, he just made an incision and then placed a stent in my pancreas. Looking back, all of it fits together, and they really do think that this is going to ease a great deal of the pain that I have felt for so many years. We did have a little setback, ending up back in the hospital just two days after going home. I had ended up with a blood clot from my PICC line that they had finally put in because of my horrible tiny veins that have been ruined through the years of so many hospital stays. Then when they put me on blood thinners, after only two days my blood was so thin that they could not even measure it in the lab. The blood thinners are supposed to make your blood clot at 2 to 3 times the normal rate, and the highest the lab could measure was 23 times the normal rate...mine was past that! The doctors said if I had fallen, not even cut myself, but just run into something, I could have bled to death. That was definitely scary because we have dealt with the pain, nausea and vomiting for years now, but never blood clots or internal bleeding. Once again, the doctors took very good care of me and I only had to stay three additional days in the hospital.
I spent the next few weeks trying to return to "normal", and I am still not there. I did go back to school a week and a half ago, and that has definitely been a challenge, but good to get back into a routine. Although I must admit that I am already looking forward to the holiday breaks! I still feel quite weak, but my school is being so supportive and we have had an amazing amount of help from family and friends.
This post is a little too informational for my taste, but it's hard to know how to explain all that I have been feeling without explaining what we have been dealing with. Pain has been a part of my daily life for so long, and while the doctors say that this won't completely change that, I look forward to the prospect of it being much less. We have felt so surrounded in prayer and love from our community of faith, and I have been reminded once again of what an amazing family I have and what an amazing and powerful God that we serve.
It's funny and amazing to me because, honestly, I think that Matt did know what he was getting into. He knew that taking me as a life mate also meant taking all of my health problems. And he took me anyway. He has been my rock through all of this and I can't ever find words to say how thankful I am that God made him my husband. I don't know how he did all that he did, spending the nights in a chair by my bedside, taking care of Jack, going to work every day, not to mention running lesson plans back and forth to school and putting my grades in the computer for me! What a guy! My parents and Matt's parents were amazing in helping with Jack and also spent countless hours by my side. My mom and dad have been there every step of the way, since this first began many years ago...and there is no way I could have ever made it through without them.
I have written before about Matt being the student council president at Fort Worth Christian when my mom was working there and I was in the hospital eight years ago (the six month stay). He led many prayers for Mrs. Tyndall's daughter(that would be me) who was so sick in the hospital. Little did he know that he was praying for the girl that would one day be his wife. We know now that God was answering those prayers for years to come. He healed me then and those prayers that Matt prayed for my healing continue to be answered as he now stands beside me as my husband.
I am, above all, thankful for the Lord's healing in my life. Just as I have been saved by Him, and continue to be saved each new day, I have witnessed first hand as he daily heals not just my soul but also my body. He also knew what he was getting into, and yet He still sent His son to save me. In the past month, I can honestly say that I have felt that salvation on a physical as well as spiritual level in a whole new way. Praise God for new beginnings...His power really is made perfect in our weakness!
Thursday, September 14, 2006
pray for jack's pappy
Please say a prayer for my dad at 11:30 this morning. He is going in for a heart cathterization. You can read more of the details on mom's blog .
I can remember each one of my dad's three heart attacks like they were yesterday, and I am just so thankful that the doctor is working to prevent another one. As with any procedure there is some anxiety. We are not afraid, because we know that the victory is already the Lord's. My dad is one of the most unselfish, loving, convicted, funny, and tender-hearted people that I know. My sweet son shares his middle name. He even knows that, he calls himself Jack "Shwanklin" (Franklin), named after Pappy "Shwanklin"...we are grateful for the prayers we have been covered with already and I just ask that if you have a moment at 11:30 to stop and pray that the Lord has his hand on my dad during this procedure.
On another note...that means I need to go make sure that I am prepared for my sub this afternoon...Yikes!
I can remember each one of my dad's three heart attacks like they were yesterday, and I am just so thankful that the doctor is working to prevent another one. As with any procedure there is some anxiety. We are not afraid, because we know that the victory is already the Lord's. My dad is one of the most unselfish, loving, convicted, funny, and tender-hearted people that I know. My sweet son shares his middle name. He even knows that, he calls himself Jack "Shwanklin" (Franklin), named after Pappy "Shwanklin"...we are grateful for the prayers we have been covered with already and I just ask that if you have a moment at 11:30 to stop and pray that the Lord has his hand on my dad during this procedure.
On another note...that means I need to go make sure that I am prepared for my sub this afternoon...Yikes!
Tuesday, September 05, 2006
Jehovah Shammah...God is with Us
Well it's been a long time since I last posted. Things have been pretty crazy around here. We have been so blessed with a smooth time of transition with me going to work. It has been hard; hardest on me I think. But I am so thankful to have a wonderful supportive husband who walks alongside me, and even more thankful to have a Father in Heaven who has literally been holding me in the palm of His hand these last few weeks. I will continue to rely on his strength, because he is the only source of any strength that I have. I appreciate all the prayers that have gone up on behalf of our family and ask that you continue to pray. The Lord always provides for us, even though that provision doesn't always look the way we might have imagined it. Matt and I have learned that lesson several times and are certainly in the midst of learning it right now. Those of you who have witnessed me bursting into tears at the drop of a hat, thank you for your understanding! I am blessed with so much encouragement, love and support.
On another note, Derek Webb, formerly of Caedmon's Call has a new album out that deals with some important and sensitive themes including social justice, poverty, and politics. These are hard topics, but certainly ones that need to be talked about within our communities of faith. I am thankful for talented musicians who are not simply using their voice to manipulate, but rather seek to open up discussion about the things that should concern the people of God most...his children. Rather than seeking to identify with a political party, maybe we should remember where our true identity lies and who our allegiance is to. You can actually download the entire album for free (with the artist's blessing) at this site , and you can read more about why he is offering it for free here. The older I get, the more I realize that being a child of God is about loving your brothers and sisters...all of them. I am so thankful for the many voices that I hear speaking out for a return to the greatest command...love.
***COMING SOON...Pictures of Jack's First Hair Cut!!! (Yes, we actually did it...but don't worry...I couldn't let all the curls go!)
On another note, Derek Webb, formerly of Caedmon's Call has a new album out that deals with some important and sensitive themes including social justice, poverty, and politics. These are hard topics, but certainly ones that need to be talked about within our communities of faith. I am thankful for talented musicians who are not simply using their voice to manipulate, but rather seek to open up discussion about the things that should concern the people of God most...his children. Rather than seeking to identify with a political party, maybe we should remember where our true identity lies and who our allegiance is to. You can actually download the entire album for free (with the artist's blessing) at this site , and you can read more about why he is offering it for free here. The older I get, the more I realize that being a child of God is about loving your brothers and sisters...all of them. I am so thankful for the many voices that I hear speaking out for a return to the greatest command...love.
***COMING SOON...Pictures of Jack's First Hair Cut!!! (Yes, we actually did it...but don't worry...I couldn't let all the curls go!)
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